I have been talking to the creators of WeConcile for awhile now. I am very excited that their site is now up and running and that they gave KP and I a preview in order to take a look at their WeConcile Online Marriage Counseling Program!
You know that I’m a big fan of honesty. Especially when it comes to the struggles about marriage. I’m also a big fan of marriage commitment and finding a way to work through the tough times. One of the main goals of this blog is to try to get marriage resources to those who might need it — something I wish I had had when KP and I were struggling.
I’m really excited to FINALLY get a chance to tell you about this program!!
First though – I realize that this post might not apply to everyone who is reading right now. However, can I ask a favor either way? Would you be willing to share this post? You never know which of your friends or family might be currently (and secretly) looking for a program like this but don’t know where to find it. You could possibly help someone’s marriage that you don’t even realize.
Cost: $60/mo, with an upfront 6-month commitment (so $360 for first payment). After 6 months, a couple is welcome to continue the program, at $60 month-to-month. You can get $30 off by using my referral link HERE.
Weekly Requirement: You can work at your own pace, however WeConcile recommends devoting a couple hours each week to the program.
Length of Time to Complete Program: Varies. WeConcile recommends a minimum of 6 months (hence the initial commitment required), however couples may desire to extend beyond 6 months in order to work more slowly through the program or if they wish to continue access to the program support.
How Does It Work
Once you and your spouse/partner enroll in the program you’ll each be given separate login info where you can set up your profiles. In each section, you are each given your own assignments to work on separately and then come together to discuss.
Working Through The Program
The entire WeConcile program consists of a series of 24 Reading Levels. Each level is further broken down into Lessons, which contain Exercises and Discussions. Much of the WeConcile program is done individually, with spouses checking in with each other periodically for discussion or to complete shared exercises.
While each spouse should expect to work through their portion of the program alone, BOTH spouses will need to be done with a Reading Level before either spouse will be able to move to the next level.
The WeConcile program itself is meant for a couple to go through on their own, without the need of a therapist or guidance counselor. However, many couples prefer to occasionally still meet with a live, objective person to discuss their discoveries while working through the WeConcile program. WeConcile has made this easy for couples who might be working concurrently with a counselor or therapist. Please see below where I talk about the “Coach Program”.
The WeConcile Program
This is where WeConcile truly excels.
On the WeConcile homepage, they sort of show what’s involved in the program, but imho, they don’t do a very good job of explaining how it all works. Which is why I’m so glad that I have this chance to write up this review and explain it for anyone who might be wondering how the program actually works! After you’ve signed into the WeConcile portal, you’ll want to invite your partner (if not already invited).
From there you can get started on the program. When you first log in, your Home screen will remind you which Reading Level & Lesson you left off last time.
You can also go to the Reading icon, which will open up the Reading Levels window. Each level (of 24 levels) has 5-7 Lesson. Each Lesson has 2-5 Activities & Discussions. As you can see, this is why WeConcile recommends at least 6 months of working through the program – there’s a staggering amount to take in and work through together!
As you work through each section and lesson, you’ll complete exercises and have discussions with your spouse, which will automatically be marked off on the ‘Your WeConcile Journey’ checklist. There’s a sense of accomplishment from crossing off all the checkboxes. 🙂
At certain steps in the journey, and before you and your spouse can have certain discussions, you’ll both need to be at the same spot in the readings. If one spouse works ahead, the other can send an invite through the WeConcile system to let the other spouse know that they are ready to have a discussion as soon as the other one is too.
Either way, you will not be able to move on to the next Reading Level until both you and your spouse have completed all required exercises and discussions in the level before.
One of my favorite inclusions in the WeConcile program is the Urgent Care tab. Whenever you and your spouse are confronting difficult topics, it’s almost inevitable that heated emotions will rise to the surface. In fact, there may be times throughout the process where it feels as though your relationship was better off BEFORE you started counseling. This is where the Urgent Care section comes into play.
Let’s say that an argument with my husband has left me feeling extremely worked up. I’m feeling full of anger to the point where I can’t continue talking to him without responding in anger. I know I need to calm down, but I’m not sure how. So I go to Urgent Care> A Specific Feeling I Am Experiencing> Anger or Frustration> Calm This Feeling Down.
This will bring me to a list of exercises I’ve already gone through in the WeConcile journey that relates to my current need. I kind of wish that we weren’t limited to only getting Urgent Care help on topics that we’ve already covered in the journey so far, but I still think that the Urgent Care section is brilliant anyways, so I’m ok with it as it is.
Other Important Notes
Spirituality/Faith: WeConcile is a secular program and can be used by couples of all faiths, or no faiths. While there are no specific faith elements to the program (at least not in the parts I previewed), WeConcile recognizes that spirituality/faith can be an important component in relationships as well. In short words, this program is good for both the religious and non-religious.
Coach’s Guide: While many couples may choose to go through WeConcile on their own, other couples may prefer to work through WeConcile in conjunction with a therapist or pastor. Or, a therapist, pastor, or counselor might encourage their clients to go through the WeConcile program with their guidance. In these cases, WeConcile offers a free Coach’s Guide version of the program to the counselor in order to help guide the couple through their WeConcile journey.
Overall, I was seriously impressed with WeConcile. Really impressed with it. So much so, that I’m strongly considering paying on my own in order to go through the entire program (not just my free preview) with KP. I loved the way it is set up. I loved the sense of accomplishment in checking off all the boxes on each lesson of each level of the ‘WeConcile Journey’. I loved that both partners get to work in their own login, on their own pace, and connect with their partners as needed. I loved the Urgent Care help section. I loved all the opportunities for written response and reflection (that I didn’t even cover in this review).
I really want to spread the word about this one. I see WeConcile not just as another online program out there — but as a much needed opportunity for struggling marriages. ESPECIALLY marriages with children, or other obligations, or financial considerations that can’t easily get away for weekly sessions, let alone pay $100+/hr every week for a few months!! No wonder so many marriages fall apart after kids enter the picture – affording counseling, and arranging childcare, and time off work…it almost seems easier in the moment to just ignore your marriage problems than to try to fix them instead.
I am so thankful that options like WeConcile exist and that someone sought to fill this need and create this program. If you’ve been considering marriage counseling, but the whole idea of it has felt overwhelming to you, I strongly consider looking into WeConcile as an option. Not only is it waaaay cheaper:
WeConcile: $360/6months – $30 for using my referral link = $330.
Traditional in-person counseling: $100+/hr x 4 hrs/mo x 6 months = $2,400+.
But the program can also be completed in the privacy of your own home, on your own time, and after the kids are in bed so you don’t need childcare.
How to Get Started
If you sign up for WeConcile using THIS LINK, you’ll save $30 off the initial fee. (Since WeConcile is so new, and since I’ve been in contact with the owners for awhile, my link is the ONLY discount out there for WeConcile right now)
Once you’ve signed up, you’ll need to make sure that your partner is signed up as well. See the screenshot above for how to get your partner’s signup link. Then start working though the program. Be sure that you and your partner are willing to dedicate time each week to working through WeConcile.
I’m hoping to eventually write a more personal followup to this post if/when KP and I are able to go through it in more depth. Look for a Part 2 to this review in the next several months perhaps!